'MERICA

Sports have been the foundation of my life, so it is no surprise that my family takes the Olympics very seriously. I don't care what sport it is, I'll be watching with great interest and excitement, because America, you guys. But my excitement doesn't hold a candle to my Dad. You know all those crazed fans you hear about? That's my dad. Let me see if I can put this into perspective for you all.

Once, my dad went to a Clemson game with some of his friends. Things got exciting and my dad came down with the hammer (the hammer is sort of similar to watching a person crank a weed eater) while screaming "YEAH BOY!" and he clocked the lady sitting in front of him in the back of the head. It knocked her out. Let me repeat that. My dad punched a lady in the back of the head and it KNOCKED HER OUT. She spent the rest of the game curled up in her seat, crying. My dad doesn't even like Clemson. He LOVES America. This is serious.

Last night my uncle was in a car accident. We were waiting in the emergency room and Katie Ledecky, the 15 year old swimmer began her race. The first 700 meters were spent making comments on her age and whether we thought she could keep the world record pace. The last 100 meters were spent with me hiding my face in horror as my dad stood up and chanted "GO, GO, GO, GO, GO!" Nurses were scowling. Patients were staring. Babies started crying. And these are at public places. So you can only imagine what it's like in the privacy of our house when people like Michael Phelps get to going.

I love the Olympics. My dad clearly loves the Olympics. I'm just glad they only come around every four years because I have to recuperate from his excitement. His favorite event is track and field which has just started. Wish me luck. It's going to get dangerous.